Summit #12:
Donny and Vladdy discuss resolution of the Syrian crisis.

Imagine Donald and Vladdy meeting in the latter’s presidential suite at the Four Seasons Hotel in central Damascus to share a song and a coke as they resolve their differences on how to end the Syrian Crisis.

After a little friendly banter, the now good friends identify a way for each country to consider themselves the catalyst for peace, perhaps even candidates for the Nobel Peace Prize.

Each man realizes there is one last sticking point: who leaves first? Both are concerned about the political optics to friend and foe alike. Donny suggests his son-in-law and senior advisor, Jared Kushner, could play the role of mediator. Vladdy responds negatively by playing the dark, Russian symphonic classic The Dance of Death.

Donny, who hasn’t got a clue about classical music, misreads the situation. “Vlady, beautiful, really beautiful. Then we have a deal?”

Fortunately, because of our numerous Russian-American cross-cultural initiatives during the past decade, our sources have provided exclusive access to the unredacted transcripts of the Damascus meeting as well as a Kremlin-approved illustration that captures the essence of resolving the decade-long Syrian Crisis.

So, if you pride yourself on knowing the real facts behind today’s headlines, you might want to pick up a copy of DONNY AND VLADDY. Politically Incorrect, Curiously Candid Conversation Between the World’s Two Most Controversial Leaders.